Life hacks for Asians.

Life hack for Asians #1:

If you’re ever in a rush and you need to somehow make your way through a busy crowd, all you need to do is find a middle aged white guy who is equally rushing around and walk closely behind him. You’ll notice the crowds parting and you’ll be able to follow him walking a straight line through crowds and busy intersections.

Life hack for Asians (females) #2:

When you want more “engagement” on your Instagram posts, all you have to do is post a photo of your Asian face and add #asianlady #japanesegirl and presto, you’ve got your engagement.

Life hack for Asians #3:

When you’re walking through the city and those fundraising people approach you, smile and say “ni hao” or pretend to speak with whoever you’re with in any Asian sounding language and they will promptly leave you alone. No need for any “oh I’m so sorry I have somewhere to be…” “but this will only take a second…” exchanges necessary.

~

And don’t get me wrong, I’m still angry at this world which has created this kind of patriarchal “system” but who wants to be angry everyday? Why not actually understand the social structures that exist and use them in a way to better service ourselves?

Yes it sucks that people seem to move out of the way when they see a middle aged white guy rushing through the city as if he must have somewhere important to be, but how awesome is it to know that he is your ticket to a smooth journey too. Yes, #japanesegirl brings in a lot of creepy-ass “likes” but if I’m needing to show my level of Instagram engagement for some kind of outcome, why not use this to my advantage?

I do feel like I’m treading on thin ice writing about this though, because essentially this is how people have oppressed minorities throughout history. They’ve used whatever they can get for their own advantage and disregarded and harmed all those left behind. However, when you are a minority, this kind of behaviour constitutes (I believe) “reclaiming” our strength and our privilege. We know what it feels like to be on the other side of privilege and so therefore we use what we can to prop ourselves up a little bit. We don’t use these “hacks” to the detriment of others, we do it to bring us back up to a level playing field.

I share this idea as a way to empower us as a community of Asian Australians. Life can get pretty rough when all we do is sit around and talk about all the injustices that have affected our lives. Instead, why not see the opportunities in our struggles? And more importantly, take action on these opportunities?

So a few of actionable points for you today:

• In what particular situations do you feel “oppressed”? Can you try to view this from different angles to see if there is an element of empowerment that you’re not able to see?

• Once you’ve creatively found that empowering angle, notice the humour in the situation. How funny is it when you say Ni Hao to a white person trying to ask for your money and they quickly back off?! I find my city escapades difficult to do with a straight face these days.

• Find someone to share this new revelation with. You might start to notice that most of my actions involve externalising and actually telling someone. This is because Asians are typically great at internalising things and we need to collectively work on our ability to get stuff out of our bodies and brains.

• Go and do the thing that you’ve discovered. And every time you do it (ie. every time you follow a busy white man down the street), give yourself a pat on the back and thank “the system” that created this opportunity for you.

But as you do this, make sure that you’re not hurting or oppressing anyone else. Make sure that you’re not choosing to abuse your privilege out of anger as this will inevitably hurt others. Find the light and find the humour in these situations instead and… enjoy :)